New Year's

Hey, today's a new year, its a new day
we can drink our red wine and say what we need to say
its a minute til midnight and everyone's drunk
dreaming the coming days will all be okay

Hey, it's 12 o clock on our watches
as we straddle the past and count a years worth of notches
I'll tell you that rumor the teens used to say
about kissing on midnight and never going away
and we'll dance and we'll sing all night like the rest
it's ending and starting as the ultimate test
and the heart keeps on beating in the chest
of the new year

so you can take back that old new years kiss that you gave me
a year is just too long to dream
never start new years with kisses and wine
things never end up like they seem

hey, today's a new year, it's a new day
haven't seen you in a while, you took to dwindling away
it's a minute til midnight and I'm sitting alone
a year ago, you promised you'd stay

so you can take back that old new years kiss that you gave me
a year is just too long to dream
never start new years with kisses and wine
things never end up like they seem

From Under the Blanket

It's alright

You can come out from your cover
There isn't any other here but me.
And I guess
The sunshine should be on it's way
Just listen to what they all say
I guess it's just that time of year
When everyone is in each others way.
And remember
I know you inside out,
Your palms and thoughts and eyes and smile and heart
so it's alright, it's alright
You can hide, but not for long
I'll get you out, 
I'll get you out
With this song.

The Mysterious Choice

It's always the good men. The brave, the fathers.

The hand holders, driving teachers,

The protectors, the strong.

Don't chase the wind, it's impossible to catch, you'll let go as soon as you hold on.

Its always the the good men. The dads, the friends.

The meal cutters, bed makers,

The preachers, the blind.

Keep his words in your heart and your thoughts to the sky, don't worry, Heaven is kind.

It's always the good men. The bright eyed, the smiling.

The givers, the weepers,

and the too young to go,

His blood is the blood that courses through your veins, and hes with you more than you will ever know.

Mother Bird

Try not to worry,

Spread your wings

You’ve much more time.

Though your egg has hatched

And your baby is flying,

Keep warm in your nest

And she’ll come home.

Robin, robin, robyn.

You made something beautiful.

Nothing Short of a Mystery

Complicated, what a word

to tear my heart to shreds;

to peel my skin away from home,

leave aching in my head.

I thought I knew the ending

of the play--I acted cautiously--

and came to find the ending was

nothing short of a mystery.

This, my pride and jest

I give you easily and willfully

These, my eyes and ears

I give you secretly and skillfully.

So ends the show I wrote in vain,

the lines I scribbled thoughtfully--

Just to learn the ending was

nothing short of a mystery.

With Wings and Feathers

Remember to visit me when you fly from house to house;

A black silhouette against the rising sun.

You were always up before I was,

But tonight is a different story.

I can hear you breathing from a mile away

In the darkness, in the quiet,

Your machine going in and out

Like artificial lungs

A few feet from your bed,

Where I used to sleep as a little girl.

I’ll feed you the finest crumbs from my homemade bread;

And your favorite—mashed potatoes.

You’re as thin as a million dollar bill,

a dove kept in a tiny cage.

I hear your stories echo in my battling head

Of your love, of your heartache

Your eyes lighting up

Blinking like the machine

A few feet from your bed

Where I used to sleep as a little girl.

I’ll be barefoot on the grass come the morning time,

When the fog is too thick to fly through.

We’ll talk until the sun comes up,

And laugh until it sets.

I know you won’t be able to say much

Through your beak, big and black,

Fresh air in your lungs

And no need for the machine

A few feet from your bed

Where I used to sleep as a little girl.

Hair Eyes Ears

Take a walk through my dusty head

Slip your fingers over jars of eyes 

Ears, words, flesh

Still soft to the touch

Just like I remember 

the shadow on the shelf 

Is on it's way out

But it's gripping with it's nails

As you can clearly see

Brainstorms are my city bus

Dirty and dripping

But that's how travel works 

In here, place to place

Ride them to Paris, it's here

To London Rome and back again

Take the gripper with you

Get it out just get it out

the devil's helper

I shake at his blank eye stare

blank eye magnets, brown eyed vortex

pull me in along with the world

 flicked his tongue with stories

made me a siren, made me a monster

cleaned my side of the mirror

the devils helper's older than my home

built by my father, safe until he entered

can i lock the door until were done?

instinct says its poison,

im ready to die, he says its pretty

like me, says the devils helper

Maps

This is an old one! and more relevant now than when written!

Yesterday,
I looked at a map of          cities.

It is crazy how they           hold
so many people.             

I keep                     memories
of places like that         
in a little box; the pictures    of
you
that I took                  When I
never wanted you to leave.

Warm. I                           was

warm then. Because the city was   holding

me, and I was holding                you.

Music

I'm surrounded entirely now,
dancing in between the bright lights of the stars
against the black of the sky
"I'm leaving."
You left.
I kept dancing, but I lost my balance and fell.
I hear the sound
faintly and then its next to me
my ear is screaming, my brain is shutting down,
my heart is running away.
Why is your music here
you left!
let me dance, let me smile,
let me enjoy the stars
Is it you here or is it me?
Let me dance, let me smile
just keep your music away from me.

Remastered

I picked the petals from the pansies

scattered fluffies from the lions

tore the thorns from all the roses

peeled the stems of all the daisies

left their skeletons as decorations

blowing in the wind

never seen a brighter beauty

come from such and ugly thing

View From Above

Look at me, clutching, so red-eyed and raging

Already losing the war that I'm waging

I could've hidden you up in the caves

Torn you to pieces or used you as slaves

But here you are lazily laying in bed

Drinking my sunlight like wine!

I can crash my thunder right under your heels

I can rumble and tumble the strength from the steel

I can level your structures and sculptures to fields

But you'd pick up the flowers

and continue to steal!

You're just a robber with dirt in his eyes

I'll tear off the mouth of the face you disguise

I could have swollen your hands and your ears

I could have traded your comforts for fears

But here you are, warm, with my given skin

Here you are, basking and dripping with sin!

send them back

 If you weren't such a dreamer,

and if you weren't as far away as     I

this distance would be physical
and I wouldn't think twice about
seeing you go,
knowing I'd see you again.

But when I float the open seas
and when  I                                   miss
every opportunity to hoist

the memories I have collected
from the water and show              you,
it only reminds me that this
distance has cracked our lives
and nested inside our minds,

and in the end it's just best 

to send them back to sea.

Dear Miles

you slip, slide, tumble
forwards and backwards, a treasure to find
metal in hand and me in mind
I could dance all night but I've got to go

you descend, transcend, pretend
that nothing stands before you
life will never bore you
i could dance all night but I've got to go

you shine, incline, your mine
get out your music maker
take on the world and shake her
I could dance all night but I've got to go

A Life Without Spoons

Here's a little tidbit from the soon to be award winning non fiction/fiction book I'm writing about spoons and their various uses.

Chapter Seven: Murder 

If one was to spend countless hours microscopically delving into history, losing sleep and severing (no pun intended) all human connections, I am almost positive they would discover a case of murder involving a cheater and a spoon. The spoon in question not being an object of the cheater’s desire, but the object that was found, bloody and abandoned, near the body of the saucy individual--caught spooning with another lover in the light of the moon.    
    Spoons have a way of working themselves, if necessary, into every violent aspect of life. They can impale, cause blunt force trauma, choke, and if tied to the leg of an unsuspecting field mouse--drown. They can also injure heavily, but injuries tend to be on the low end of the totem pole when juxtaposed to full blown murder.
    I will take a minute to revisit my childhood, dim and cloudy, with the exception of Moriah, the younger sister of my very good friend, Nick. Through the haziness she shines through, spoon in hand, clasping tighter then Poseidon to his Triton. With a mighty blow, she would bring her arm down upon innocent guests, visitors, and family members, and with a loud “THWAP”, cause a one handed headache that lasted for hours. Occasionally there were multiple blows until she was apprehended, the spoon quickly removed from her grip, and carried into the other room for questioning. This obsession went on for years, until she was either slowly weaned from the spoon or one day just realized that she had devoted years of spoon use to her left hand.

The Ocean and the Stone

sailors climb upon my back and never stay for long
but you are always up against me, whispering your songs
it's a wonder that a jagged, hard and glacial thing can be
forever on your mind, as the pillow of the sea

sailors had admired me but always left my sight
to drift upon your arms again and leave for home tonight
but when the mellow, laughing birds had longed for sunny rains,
you scattered them across the clouds to love what had remained

  we are both together, the ocean and the stone
the universal voice of peace, the scepter and the throne
I can never be destroyed, and you will never dry
we are both together, and we will never die.

those sailors changed my face and eyes but never changed my mind
deep inside my calloused skull, your fingers intertwined
You healed all steps that ever left a mark to stay on me,
with salty words and calming songs, you helped us fall asleep

  we are both together, the ocean and the stone
the universal voice of peace, the scepter and the throne
I can never be destroyed, and you will never dry
we are both together, and we will never die.

Penny Pincher Of The Greenlands

When I get older and grow wings I want to go to England
Sit on the shore of the whitest beaches in my head
I want to think of where I am and focus on that moment
I want to think of what you look like on my tree top bed

When I get older and grow strength I want to sail the ocean
Just ride the waves that turn my stomach in and out with calm
So I can know all of the things that keep me on my journey
the seas, the birds, the names, the sights, all written on my palm

When I get older and grow cold I'll dream of Arizona
Where all I see is summer sun colliding with the hills
Saguaros silhouette my dreams and paint my way to fortune
I left you where I used to be, stalking dollar bills

Tension Stepping

It's cloudy on a monday and I'm walking on a wire
The more I think about it, the faster it gets higher
I wonder where your going while you're holding the other side
When I said I wasn't scared I hope you knew I lied

It's everything thats up here with me tearing down my walls
You said that it's alright because you know everyone falls
The other day I saw a face that caught me by surprise
It smiled and rattled up my fears, it smiled and caught your eyes

Theres a man I meet sometimes, he tells me that it's funny
Says the places that I'm dreaming of aren't really all that sunny
"Go to where you want to be," he says, "Go to where you know
that everyone you live for is ready for your show."

So here I am and waiting for my audience of one
Who left this place so long ago, my show's so close to done
Keeping track of losing time and when it will find me
Standing high above because I went where I longed to be.

Bronchitis

It must be some disease I have,
But maybe everyone else has it too.
I’m not really sure, I’ve never asked.
Maybe I’ll shoot this question by you.

I don’t know how I’ll do this,
But maybe I will someday,
This disease is driving me crazy,
Because my mind doesn’t know what to say.

I scratch at indefinite answers,
And I cough when I need make a choice,
Maybe you’ll know what’s diseasing me,
One symptom is I’ve lost my voice.

Neverland

I say...

we fly away to a place

where flowers bloom and never wilt,

the water flows uphill as much as down,

and the smell of summer rain or autumn air

fills every inch of sparkly land!

I'll tread the caves...

collect light filled crystals

and wear them around my neck

while you dive the neon reefs

and find treasure with the map we drew.

We'll act out plays and play with sticks

and even if our hair is graying

our minds will stay as sharp and shiny as the

swords we imagine!

I Could Scream

I could scream at the birds,
make them scatter
across the skies like
strangers fleeing from one another.

I could scream at the sun
and the way it falls behind the hills
before the darkness
turns everything invisible.

I could scream at you,
but I'm afraid that like the
birds or the sun,
you'll flee like a stranger
and turn everything invisible.

No, Thank You

Winter tried to kiss me yesterday,

And of course I ran away,

But winter’s a wanton season,

And it doesn’t care if you aren’t ready.

I turned around and looked at fall,

And realized that its leaves were all

I wanted in a season,

But winter still was smiling.

There’s a day this time of year

That always leaves me planted here

Lusting towards the day before

When everything was fine.

I get kissed upon this day,

With snow and cold and winds that say,

“Hello, we’re back to freeze you,

It’s winter, and we’re here to tease you.”

Dabunnies

Who are you to say that I’m odd?

The spot I occupy is different than yours, that’s all.
And I’m sure that I’ve gathered more skin cells than you anyway.
My dust ball is mine,
so you can keep yours on the other side of the underside of this couch.
And though I may roll from time to time, I may bump into your side,
The truth is, we’re all going to get sucked up eventually.

Impossible

One, two, one million.
Impossible to count them.
Impossible to count how many
things that could make us smile.
It’s impossible to think that maybe
we’re not the only ones who are laughing.
I won’t think about it if you don’t.
We can count them as they fall,
Like bright flaming arrows,
So impossible to catch,
So easy to remember.

Reverse Compass

I grabbed my coat this morning,
and I grabbed my sail, my crew, and my ship
ready to set sail until the end.
I wasn’t going to tell you,
I wasn’t even planning on telling myself,
for the direction of the wind was a mystery today.
I grabbed my coat this morning,
and I grabbed my hat, my things, and your picture.
I walked out the door and the wind stung my face
and my sail turned my ship around.
It seems the direction of the wind today
was pointing right back to the door.

Change Of Tongue

I wish we could go back to the days
when everything was warm.
I was speaking differently,
when we sat under the storm
watching the stars as they fell at our feet
in the spot that you picked out.

These days its like a hurricane
the winds aren't dying down.
I look up to the sky to see
the stars aren't falling to the ground.
Forever is a word just as silence is a threat
In the spot that you picked out.

These days, well I don't talk so loud
my mind is like a train,
I'm just speaking differently
and it puts my soul to shame.
I cant remember when I last sat warm
in the spot that you picked out.

Hopefully

I don't know if I'll come back into town
to see what times done to your face
to see what you did with the dreams that you spoke
Or see the woman that's sitting in my place
She'll knit, and she'll sew
She'll do all the things that you've come to know
She'll bake, and she'll draw
She'll be your summer, with her strawberry jam

Oh, well I don't know where I'll be
But hopefully you think of me
Hopefully, hopefully
I get sad when the rain begins to pour
Memories come rushing through the door

I don't know if I'll come back to town
To follow the past that I shed
Or follow the the path that leads to your door
Or even follow the thoughts in my head

I'm wrong, and you're right
I've seen such sadness and I've taken a bite
from the world, but all I want is you...
I love what I know and I know your heart is true
Oh, well i don't know where I'll be
But hopefully you think of me
Hopefully, hopefully
I get sad when the rain begins to pour
Memories come rushing through the door
But hopefully you think of me
Hopefully, hopefully

Holes In The Sky

You say let the wind

take you over,

let it make you like a bird

you say let the years,

make you older

so you cherish every word

It's not the end, oh no,

you say

Just the beginning, and hey

maybe our destiny will magnetize our souls

and then we'll be under the stars again,

counting microscopic holes in the sky, oh

just you and i.

just you and i.

I'm sick of dark nights

and bright days

They don't seem like they should be

because with you walking

the city

I know you're not thinking of me

It's not the end, oh no,

you say

Just the beginning, and hey

maybe our destiny will magnetize our souls

and then we'll be under the stars again,

counting microscopic holes in the sky,

just you and i.

just you and i.

Places To Go

In the dark streets of Italy,
We can walk past the merchants that call our silhouettes
The dirty charming reptiles with eyes like cigarettes
We can drink from the fountain in the middle of the square
And stay this way forever, sipping on the streetlight air

In the calm of the ocean tide,
We can swim out to the light house that perches on the stone
Claim it as our castle, and you can have your throne
You can be my king, and I can be your queen
We can live this way forever in our castle on the sea

In the quiet of the countryside,
We can build a home inside the earth, and nest like we are birds
Coo and sing like warblers and absorb each others words
Our wings will take us anywhere when our hearts yearn to roam
We can fly the world forever, we can always fly back home.

Until Then

I want to travel the world until my bones are as fragile as the ice in the arctic,

my hands are as twisted as the roads of Italy,

and my voice is coarse as the sands of the Pacific.

I'll place myself with hungry eyes in front of thousands of plates,

taste the flavors of the world,

and the nectar of the soil.

Never find a house, but always have a home, like a falcon shaken from the nest.

Fallen, I'll sit under a weeping tree with hair as bright as the sun,

and as the wind picks up be swept along.

I'll waste away as time steals my breath--

but when my time comes,

I'll be as free to once again cross the oceans I crossed years ago.

The Word Perfect Part One

There you go again,

spending breath like its currency

"perfect" echoes endlessly.

my eyes water,

my mouth is mean,

my hands sit sedentary

"perfect" has no evidence

because you pulled the word from your throat,

shallow and dripping,

just so I'd feel like I was worth something to you.

Breadwinner

The dough expands effortlessly across the carpet.

The cat is consumed. The dog is half way there.

My throw pillows don't even feel this good.

Take it or leave it, the dough is here to stay.

In a few days it will turn to crust.

In a few years, possibly mold.

The house will never recuperate.

The dough wraps around my recliner,

my husbands toupee, and his bowling shoes.

Thank god those are gone. They smelled like cheese.

The faucets running. How does dough turn on a faucet.

Soon the windows will be gone and the neighbors will dial their phones.

The police will arrive and I'll say

"Just a little too much yeast!" and smile.

They'll think and I'll know.

Was I baking bread

or was I baking a new home in the Bahamas?

Flannel And Sweaters

Flannel and sweaters
Go very well togethers.
Like peas in a pod,
or like grass roots and sod.
The stars at night are like diamonds in silk,
and seeing them with you is like cookies with milk.
The weather is colder and time is slowing down
but the clock is ticking quickly and the hand's spinning around.
I wonder how that can be when the thought comes to my mind
and then I let it go and leave for someone else to find.
Anytime you need me you can just look to the sky
and even if they sting, still love the raindrops in your eyes.
And that's the story of the fall, and all else there could be,
of warm flannel and big sweaters,

of you and of me.

Water and Sand

"I just don't love it anymore," you said,

snatching up a shell from the damp sand.

You threw it into the water and it sank

into the darkness.

"I just don't think it's beautiful."

What about the stories of childish dreams?

The feel of it's mist on your forehead 

when demons lit a fire in your mind?

the way you ran your fingers along it's edge

and the way you sank into it's arms 

and floated far away?

"I just don't love it anymore," you said,

as I stood in front of you on the edge of the ocean,
salt on my cheeks and sea glass in my chest.

Superglue

Something's missing from here.
A laugh from the passenger's seat,
a rock on the moonlit window.
Secrets, sunshine, starlight.
Something's missing from here.
A picture on the wall or
your outline in the leaves.
Holding, heaven, hell.
Somethings missing from here
and I've got a proposition.
If you give it back,
I promise to glue it back in place.